All About Us
by x-Wabisuke-x
Summary: The problems with this ship and some rage from your friendly neighborhood me. ZoSan/SanZo
1. Chapter 1

**HI! Sorry if you thought this was an actual ZoSan/SanZo fic… I'd be disappointed to :c. I didn't exactly go into detail in the summary because I didn't want the admins to delete it on sight.**

**Anyway, what you're about to read is a rant completely revolving around the ZoSan/SanZo fandom. I completely understand and encourage if you are not interested in this and would rather walk away to find and read more /actual/ delicious ZoSan/SanZo fics. If you're not interested, please carry on!**

**If you are, then thank you for your time!**

A thing about ZoSan/SanZo.

All right, disclaimer for starters. First of all, I feel like some of the content here may directly offend some people, particularly authors of fan fictions and the like. For the record, I am not trying to insult anyone's writing ability in any way, nor am I trying to say that I am a better writer than anyone. The complaints about writing in the following paragraphs are strictly related to characterization and whether or not your work remains in character or if it just dances all over the place with no regard for who is who.

From the moment I joined the fan fiction community, which was about three years ago prior to being a big OG fic slash writer, there is one thing that has always bothered me. That is when I'm looking for fanfictions, and I see the term 'OOC' listed in the tags.

My question is… why the hell are you writing a fanfiction? If the characters are out of character then they're not the characters and therefore you're not actually writing about these characters so you might as well just write about two original characters and actually give them the traits that you want to portray.

What you're doing is one of three things:

One, you're so used to writing/reading fanfiction that you have no idea how to introduce and develop your own characters, so you use the author's work as a starting point. IE, using the names 'Zoro' and 'Sanji' establishes the appearance of the characters if nothing else.

Two, you had an idea for a sexy/smutt/fluffy scene for two characters and you like this ship so regardless of whether its in character for them or not you're going to write them into it.

Three, you are using the name of a popular ship to get more views. Because let's face it, OG fics don't get much attention these days.

I take ZoSan/SanZo seriously. It's hard to explain because I don't believe it should be canon or is secretly canon, but at the same time it feels very real to me. It's not just one of those ships that I think of or thought of off-handedly and felt "wouldn't that be cute" …it's actually something that when I watch the show and see the characters I just feel that in some dimension or alternate universe or reincarnation it's /right./ Like, more than any other couple in the show, they could be together, and they could weather anything and never look at or think about or feel romantically for anyone else. ZoSan/SanZo to me is that old couple you see sitting on a park bench, quietly with one person's hand atop the others between them.

It's that crazy married couple that have been together for fifty years and you rationalize that the only reason they're still together is because they depend on each other financially. Because you just can't fathom that people who fight and tease and insult each other so much could still be in love.

There is a connection and bond that is special between Zoro and Sanji even in canon. I don't believe that Oda intended upon it, but nor do I believe it's just a figment of a shipper's imagination. Again, I'm not saying they're secretly in love in canon, but despite all their insults and fighting, even fans who don't ship ZoSan/SanZo should agree that Zoro and Sanji do have a special sort of respect and/or attention for one another.

For Zoro, I feel that it's more about an attention to Sanji, that doesn't carry respect or dislike or anything certain. Strength means everything to Zoro, and he recognizes Sanji as a strong person, both inside and out. Sanji is diligent about facing his opponents in a fight, progressing physically, as well as about his purpose in the crew as a cook, which is cooking. He doesn't cower like Usopp or Nami and he doesn't try to pass off responsibilities. He faces them head on, like Zoro, and doesn't look the other way.

/Unless/ there is a female involved. This is where the extra attention to Sanji from Zoro comes from. Zoro knows that Sanji is strong, diligent, and responsible to his ambition, which are all things Zoro respects. But at the same time it baffles, and angers him that whenever a pretty girl is involved, Sanji loses his head. He doesn't spend a lot of time on it, but you'll notice whenever Sanji goes googly eyes for a girl Zoro has to insert something about him being a dumbass or an idiot. Whereas you don't see Zoro call out a lot of characters for their weird quirks, like Nami's obsession with money or Luffy's with meat. Which isn't to say Zoro doesn't respect Luffy, but I think from the beginning that Zoro's respect for Luffy has been almost based around that goofy naivety. For instance, Luffy's weird issues are basically part of his all over personality, which comes with his strength and determination. But Sanji almost transforms into a different person when a woman is involved, and Zoro doesn't understand why or how. Because one half of him is completely respectable and the other is a complete, dead-beat moron doomed to die at the first sign of a woman asking him to lay down his life for her.

So, what I mean is, for Zoro, Sanji is like a puzzle he can't solve. Something he can't understand and it annoys the shit out of him. Which, is likely part of why they get into so many fights.

Sanji on the other hand is completely aware of everything Zoro. After all, the stupid marimo isn't hard to figure out. All he does is sleep, eat, drink, train, tear down walls to reach his dream, and lay down his life for his captain and crew. Sanji respects Zoro. I believe that whole-heartedly, and that he doesn't waver from it. One might ask how he can insult and degrade someone he respects so much? The answer: he's used to it.

Zeff is probably the person Sanji respects most in the entire world, and all he and Zeff ever did was fight and call each other names. Zeff made Sanji go into rage-mode more than once during just the time we saw them together, because Sanji doesn't like being talked down to by people he respects.

Now, you could argue that Sanji's insults and fighting with Zoro don't /have/ to relate to his relationship with Zeff or the other cooks. I mean, maybe Sanji really does just think Zoro's a useless marimo and likes to call him out on it.

But, even ignoring the scene at Thriller Bark during Zoro vs. Kuma which basically /proves/ Sanji's respect and recognition of Zoro, there is evidence of a unique /attention/ that Sanji has to Zoro that he doesn't have for the rest of the crew.

For instance, I mentioned before that Zoro always needs to call Sanji out when he's being a love-cook idiot. But Zoro isn't the /only/ one who does this. Usopp and Chopper have made fun of Sanji together countless times /within hearing distance/ of Sanji and Sanji has ignored them in favor of his beautiful lady. Zoro is THE ONLY one who distracts Sanji from a girl. He always has to make his rage shark-toothy face and say "HUUH?" if it's Zoro. Anyone else he can just ignore.

Sanji has even been distracted by Zoro while fawning over a woman when Zoro /didn't/ say anything. Like at Saobody when he sees the lady at the meet stand and gets all obsessive, and Zoro goes away and he notices /mid-googly-eyes/ that Zoro is no longer there and is like "where's my marimo?"

Now, counter argument for that scene in particular, Sanji knows that between the two of them he takes the position of 'mature adult' and because that's who his he is simply catering to his responsibility to make sure idiots don't wonder off. Perfectly logical not-Zoro-related explanation that I accept.

I personally believe that ZoSan/SanZo, if you look close enough at their characters, is one of the most shippable things in One Piece (and the numbers prove it! It /is/ one of the most popular ships out there, even if most of the members of the ZoSan/SanZo community these days have forgotten why.)

That's actually what I'm really here to talk about. That bit in the parenthesis in the last paragraph, yeah that.

I have basically just vaguely explained in so many less words and references than I could, why I ship ZoSan/SanZo. Why is is /so/ important to me and why I take it /so/ seriously. And I do, honestly, almost as seriously as I take my love for One Piece as a whole.

So… my question is, do you, as a ZoSan/SanZo shipper, really know /why/ you ship it. Do you really understand the depth of this ship, or are you following a crowd? Are you the half of the ZoSan/SanZo fandom that gives us a bad name because you just do it because they're hot and manly? Or because ZoSan/SanZo is easily accessed? Please consider whether or not you are. And if you are, even just a little, please consider looking closer.

Now… some of you may have noticed that every time I mention ZoSan… or SanZo… I add the slash that divides them. That is because it seems like there is this mini war within the ZoSan/SanZo fandom over ZoSan vs. SanZo.

I am here to tell you that they are the same thing.

If you really understand this relationship and the characters within it, ZoSan and SanZo are the same thing. The only difference is a slight preference during a sex scene, and that preference should change with your mood because you can bet it'll change with the character's mood as well.

As anyone who follows me knows, ZoSan is my usual preference. I like a little dominance from both characters but in the end I find it more appealing for Sanji to accept a submissive roll and Zoro to hold tight to the dominant roll. But in the end, like any /real/ couple, they would switch it up.

If SanZo is your preference and all you write is SanZo smut scenes in your fics, that's absolutely fine.

But… here's the thing. I like SanZo too. I am usually a ZoSan seeker but I go through SanZo moods where I will literally ignore the words "ZoSan" in favor of "SanZo" regardless of the rest of the summary just because I have an idea of how Sanji would behave on top and Zoro on bottom that is currently appealing to me.

The problem lies in the content of most SanZo fics I come across. They are /horrendous/ when it comes to characterization and being in character in general. It's absolutely disgusting and offensive, I have gone into absolute rage over this, spammed my tumblr, as well as my friends on facebook. How /dare/ you call this your OTP, please get the /fuck/ out of my fandom if your respect for these characters and their relationship is so low.

To be honest I'm tired of it. To the point where I may have even considered joining these SanZo vs. ZoSan wars in favor of ZoSan because the SanZo fic selection is so disgusting. But I was quick to realize… it's not SanZo… ZoSan and SanZo are again, the same thing… it's just the authors.

I'm not here to request that SanZo authors write better, or more in character. I'm pretty much beyond that. I basically just want them out… because I know that the deal here isn't that you're having trouble writing in characters because you're inexperienced, it's because you just don't actually give a fuck about these ship. You're just a fangirl with some horny feels that really likes to see Zoro act like a 13 year old virgin.

And the same goes for anyone who writes Sanji as a 13 year old virgin, but I don't see that /nearly/ as often which is why I am targeting SanZo fans. Because generally, the SanZo community does. Not. Know. What. The. Fuck. They. Are. Doing.

I don't care about how you 'like' to see it. These characters have CHARACTER. You are shipping THEM, not your own little cutesy virgin versions of them.

Zoro and Sanji are rivals and that includes in their relationship, especially during their first few times. Submission should /not/ come easy from one or the other, and neither should expect to fully dominate the other without a problem. Sanji would never confidently insist that he's going to fuck little Zoro so hard because he knows that that's not how it works. Zoro would never just be like "oh okay" if Sanji decided he was going to put it in there because that's like him accepting that Sanji is stronger than he is. IT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN.

Moreover, Sanji is not an asshole! He doesn't forcibly coerce people into sex, whether they 'secretly want it' or not. Furthermore, Zoro and Sanji have worn a guise of a passionate hate for each other since they met. There is no way in hell that all of the sudden during their first time doing the dirty that Sanji is just going to start using cute pet names and not feel like it's weird. FURTHERMORE I think Sanji is with it enough to know that calling Zoro cute pet names is like calling a three-hundred pound gorilla "fluffy baby."

The same thing goes for ZoSan. But like I said, I don't see these problems as often in ZoSan.

The worst part of the SanZo fics, and what makes these issues stand out so much, is that there is little to no relationship development /ever/. Don't get me wrong, I have no problems with PWP. But when you mix OOC sex scenes with nothing leading up to HOW IN THE FUCK the two characters reached this completely altered behavior in their relationship THEN WE HAVE A PROBLEM.

I mean I can see when they've been together a while and have done it a couple dozen times there being goofy attempts at pet names and submission would definitely come more easily from both parties. After all, love isn't about competition and it's about being completely open, honest, heart on your sleeve. But that's not what you're portraying. You're portraying an instant unrealistic change in both their characters with no build up or explanation.

And STOP OBSESSING over what the characters LOOK LIKE to determine who needs to be on top. It's fine if you think it's just more attractive for one to be on the top or bottom. But that fact that "Zoro is more muscular than Sanji" does not automatically insist that he is the dominant party. Yes, I'm talking to you, OOC ZoSan kids.

That is not a reason. That is not /my/ reason, or anyone who actually respects the character's reason for preferring ZoSan. So SanZo, fans, stop pulling out shit like the fact that Sanji has his manly leg hair and Zoro doesn't to justify Sanji needing to be on top. Appearance. Means. Nothing.

I would like to reiterate here that once again, ZoSan and SanZo are the exact same thing.

One is just a preference. That preference can be based partly on what they look like, but what the look like does not even come close to governing who HAS to be on top. Because apparently we live in a world where one of them absolutely HAS to be on top ALL THE TIME and everything else is nope.

Basically… I'm just saying, in so many words… that you need to look harder at these characters. If you're going to be in this fandom, if you're going to step on up and make arguments about shit in this fandom than the first thing you have to do is know the characters. And know them beyond what's just in the canon… because you need a little between the lines and make-believe to really make characters into human beings. To /really/ write them as your own, but /draw/ things from the things that define them, not the things that appeal to you. If ZoSan/SanZo truly appeals to you, then what matters should be Zoro and Sanji, not whether or not you like to see grown men blush and act boyish.

I'm not asking you to agree with every single little detail I feel about their relationship, but please just stop the madness. Because it is /madness./

Once again, as someone who likes both ZoSan and SanZo (and yes, I have read, and /written/ both scenarios as well as have a special little shrine of a file for Saruya Hachi's SanZo) I'm just trying to say that this is INFURIATING. So cut it the fuck out, SanZo fans, ZoSan fans… have your preferences and fight your little versus flame wars but just please BE IN CHARACTER.

And yes it is mainly the SanZo fans. I refuse to ignore or hide that fact to make it look like I'm not targeting one side or another. And it annoys the fuck out of me because it makes me feel like I can't like SanZo. Like I have no SanZo outlet aside from doujinshis I've already read fifteen-hundred times.

Also want to mention that I have read a /lot/ of SanZo fics before boiling up to this and I have only reviewed a few of them… naturally the reviews were bad because I haven't actually found any good ones. And yes, before you say "if you don't like, don't read" I have stopped reading SanZo unless it comes from a recommendation from someone I trust. What I want to mention is that for those of you who received a review from me on a SanZo fic, I'm not only talking to you, and this isn't just because of you. Saying that because I was a lot, LOT nicer in those reviews then I have been in this essay… thing. And I don't want you to feel like I'm being passive-aggressive to you in particular. 


	2. Review Responses

In response to:

"Let people write what they want and stop shoving your opinion down everyones throats. Ive already had to see this about five times on tumblr while checking tags and now your hiding it as a fic to get people to read it. It is rude and a lot of the things you said are rude. If you want to take a pairing from an anime so seriously, dont shove it down every ones throats. Let people do what makes them happy. Stop bringng people down and being a buzz kill."

A review I received from an anonymous guest.

I'm not shoving anything. Stating isn't shoving. If I'm shoving then so are you. Shoving is when you address an individual directly and singularly, usually someone you have authority over, and tell them what to think. Stating is when you say what you think and encourage other people to agree because you feel strongly about your opinion.

Secondly, you saw it five times because multiple people reblogged it, or I tagged it with multiple things that were related. The post got over 40 notes, many of which were reblogs, so yes, you're going to see it a few times. I can't help it if people agree with me. –struts around pompously.-

Thirdly, I had posted this on /before/ tumblr and I am not "hiding" it as a fic. I just feel that its length is less of a 'post' and more of an essay, and I'm not the first person to put an essay on . I warned you what it was in bold print at the top of it. If you weren't interested, you shouldn't have read it.

I'm not bringing anyone down. It's your choice to be brought down by me. If you don't agree with me and it bothers you too much to explain why, then don't pay attention to me. Or do what I did and speak up with actual points instead of just calling me out for being "rude."

Just like it's my choice whether or not to be offended by the way this pairing is so horribly raped every single day. I choose to be offended by it because I disagree with it. If you disagree with the points I've made you can say so and explain why. But don't send me butthurt reviews just because I didn't sugar coat everything.

In response to:

"I never actually really thought about it, really. Zosan (really zosan/sanzo, but I can#t be bothered writing out the whole freaking thing) was something I stumbled upon accidentally once when scanning through the just in pile. Now that I#ve thoight a little though, I realize what you mean. They fit together like jigsaw puzzles. Zoro wouldn't be able to love someone who isn't his equal in a fight, someone he cannot rely on and trust. His entire being centers around strength.

A review I received from a guest named Sunny.

Sanji, no matter how much he flutters around the delicate ladies, needs someone who will deal with his nonsense and decourage it (sort of nami-ish, I suppose). At the same time he also need someone he can respect and trust - treat as an equal. A fragile lilly wouldn't do either. I'm not really sure who would work best for him ... maybe someone ugly? I mean someone he wouldn't fawn over. Well Zosan (as I'm calling it now) covers all those points.

I don't really know about Ooc-ness, although I personally find pet names beyound marimo and love-cook hideous. That really isn't zoro and sanji.

This turned out quite a bit longer than I wanted it to. Sorry for wasting your time."

Ha! That is so close to what I feel about ZoSan but I love how you've worded it. I mean… I think under any circumstances Sanji or Zoro could fall for someone else depending on the build up… but ZoSan just feels so right to me, and a lot of it does have to do with the way that they have an unspoken reliance and trust for one another behind their name calling and supposed rivalry. There are little moments where they are so similar and so in sync that you just feel like these two were meant for each other and will go through anything for each other when it comes down to it. Very hard to explain that to others… but I'm confident plenty of people see it.

And you didn't waste my time! I know I sounded mean in the original post but I was just kind of in rage mode and I'd never consider an insightful, thoughtful reply as a waste of time. Sorry if I give off an evil aura xD.

Plus I just generally love discussing ZoSan under any circumstances, agree or disagree, with those willing to listen. So thank you! And I'd love to chat about it :3.

…

For everyone else I will reply using the message system. Thank you for your reviews!


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